I read today over at Wifey Wednesday about our spouses Love Languages.. I have read this book before not only for my love language and my husband but also my children's. It really helps you to understand how your spouse and children love and learn. With this book I learned that my husband's love language was not the same as mine. Over the years I spent all my energy showing him how I loved, being loved. It didn't work and it was frustrating. I kept showing him how much I loved him by the way I loved to be loved and he just didn't get it.
I felt rejected for a long time because he kept telling me that I wasn't showing him I loved him. Was this man blind? I was.. It wasn't until I read The Five Love Languages did I realize that his love language was the opposite of mine.. so was my children's. I did not grow up in a touchy feely family. We rarely hugged one another, rarely saw my parents kiss or hold hands so this type of love was very foreign to me. Well, low and behold, God has a sense of humor. He gave me a husband who has the love language of touch..
So I had to really WORK at showing him love. For awhile it was literally a chore to do.. but I learned to love showing him love this way. He did too and our relationship blossomed. The article mentioned over at Wifey Wednesday about if he doesn't show me love, why should I? Well, that is what happened to me. I was showing love to him but for awhile he wasn't showing me my kind of love. Did that make me feel less important? No, not really.. Because I was giving my all to him and I was reaping the positive benefits of fulfilling his love tank with his love language we were all reaping the positive out of the situation.
He then found out what my love language was by a wonderful talk we had and he has been wonderful in fulfilling it. Like I mentioned my love language didn't come easy for my husband as well to show to me so he felt the same while he 'loved' on me.. but we all learned so much through this.. That self gratitification only goes so far. Showing someone else their love language and showing them how much you love them is much more satisfying than getting it in return.. God is good!
You can read the article over at Wifey Wednesday and join in..